… Intentionally Offensive Since 2006
categories: Dallas Cowboys, NFL Draft, Preseason

Cowboys Nation,

After a three month absence from venting my usual frustration with The Best Team In Football, we now enter into the beginning of a new year for our beloved Dallas Cowboys. I guess congratulations to the Saints are duly justified at this time, as well as a proper and suitable ‘fuck you’ to the Minnesota Vikings for beating us in the playoffs after it looked like we were on a roll headed toward the Super Bowl.
The draft is here (next Thursday night) and we have some needs. The Cowboys have been dormant in the free agency department thus far, but that doesn’t mean that changes aplenty haven’t occurred. Left Tackle Flozell Adams and Free Safety Ken Hamlin were both released, mainly because they played like they’d both already retired. This did two things: it freed up millions of dollars in the payroll, and it created two glaring areas of need in the roster. Obviously Jerry has a plan; we just don’t know what it is yet. It looks as though the Cowboys have tremendous faith in Doug Free to step in and be the protector of Tony Romo’s blind side at Left Tackle, a position that has gotten a lot of attention lately thanks to Austinite Sandy Bullock. I’m inclined to believe the Cowboys know more about Robert Brewster’s ability to step into the starting lineup than most NFL expert anal-ysts do. All you hear is smack about Free. No one is mentioning Brewster, who sat out his rookie season with an injury. The guy is supposed to be a beast. Unproven, but a beast nonetheless. I’m not so sure the Cowboys want to spend a first round draft pick on an Offensive Lineman. Mike Iupati, G, Idaho or Maurkice Pouncey, C / G Florida maybe, but it’s difficult to tell which direction Jerry is leaning in the first round. I think we need defense in the first round. I might hemorrhage (brain, not anal this time) if we take a WR.

Regarding Safety, there is one obvious pick in this upcoming draft that is a ‘can’t miss’, Eric Berry, that will be a top 5 pick. We won’t get him. Then it starts to get interesting. Will Earl Thomas (Texas) be available at #27? Is Taylor Mays (USC) worth drafting? Mays’s coverage skills are in question; we know he can hit. I’d love to see Thomas with a star on his helmet, but some special circumstances must occur in the drafting process with the first 26 teams to pick before we can have Thomas fall to us at 27. It’s doubtful JJ will trade up; the Cowboys only have six picks total this year.

Here’s the rundown on where the Cowboys pick and who I think we should / might take.

  • Round 1 (#27 overall) Earl Thomas, S Texas if available. Otherwise Pouncey or Iupati to shore up the O-line. Rolando McLain, ILB Alabama will be long gone.
  • Round 2 (#59 overall) Jared Veldheer, LT Hillsdale. 6’8”, 312 lbs, small school product, lots of upside and groomable. Good pick if the guys we want in round one are all gone.
  • Round 3 (#90 overall), Damian Williams, WR / KR USC. We need to upgrade our return game.
  • Round 4 (#125 overall), Myron Rolle, S Fla. St. if we don’t get Thomas in the first round. Otherwise Brandon Spikes, ILB, Fla. would be a great pick here.
  • Round 6 (#196 overall) either Travis Goethel, ILB AZ St. or John Connor, FB Kentucky (hopefully the Terminator isn’t after him). This depends on Deon Anderson’s legal problems for being a DFN with a gun at a nightclub. There’s a reason why the government lumps together Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms into one regulatory division.
  • Round 7 (#234 overall) Marcus Easley, WR UConn, 6’3” , 210 lbs. with 4.39 speed, this kid is tall and can fly. It’s time to cut bait with Sam Hurd, promote Kevin Ogletree, and bring in some raw talent.

I’m sure you all know that I’ll be happy to give my opinion of what Jerry ends up doing in the draft after next week. J

News around the NFL.
Donna McNadds got traded from the E-girls to the Foreskins, and raised the IQ of both teams. Now they both suck! The Cowboys now get to pound both teams twice a year and won’t have to miss McNadds in the process. Good luck, Mike Shanahan. He’s your problem now.
Ben Roethlisberger likes to nail drunk 19 yr old coeds in bathrooms (and who doesn’t?), but can’t seem to escape the Georgia police after doing so. It appears that Ben can’t get sober women to press anything against him but charges. Roethlisberger is starting to make Tiger Woods look like Man of the Year. Now it’s up to Der Furor, Mein Her Roger Goodell to hand down some arbitrary punishment. (How about Roger and Ben spend a weekend in Athens together?) Remember, Wade Wilson got a 5 game suspension and fined $100,000 for treating his DIABETES with HGH that was prescribed by his doctor! Let’s all wait and see what allegations of sexual assault will get you.

Everyone (read media) is pounding the notion that St. Louis would be crazy to not pick Sam Bradford, QB Oklahoma with the number one overall pick in the draft. I say they’d be crazy to draft him. The obvious choice for the number one overall pick is Ndamukong Suh, DL Nebraska. Then they’d have a perennial Pro Bowl player for the next 10 years solidifying their defense, and they can pick Colt McCoy, QB Texas with the first pick in the second round. He’ll be a better pro than Bradford, at a much lower price coming in as a second round pick. When has a QB from Oklahoma ever been a good pro? Even if he won the Heisman? Jason White, Josh Heupel, Nate Hybl anyone? That’s why Troy Aikman transferred to UCLA. If the Rams take Bradford, it will set back their franchise another five years. If they take Suh, then McCoy, then they’ll become a contender again. Do I care about the Lambs? Hell no! I’m just tired of all the talk about Bradford being the next Peyton Manning. For all I know, the only thing Bradford and Manning have in common is that they both like little boys. Brandon Marshall whined enough to get him run out of town here in Denver, all the way to the First National Bank of Miami. One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Ask Tiger about that.

I’ll continue the rant later.
Go Cowboys!