… Intentionally Offensive Since 2006
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Cowboys Nation,
The Best Team In Football is doing what they are supposed to do – win football games. With the victory in the Thanksgiving Day game against the Dolphins, the Dallas Cowboys have now won four in a row and are solidly in first place in the NFC East; right where they should be. Tony Romo is now 5-0 on Thanksgiving, and an amazing 19-2 in the month of November. Now he has to keep it going through the month of December and into the playoffs. I know that we should never look ahead and count our chickens just yet, but the Cowboys will have to beat some pretty good teams in the playoffs to get to the Super Bowl. I think they can beat San Francisco again, and I’m predicting here and now that the Saints will beat the Packers in the playoffs, so Dallas will have to beat New Orleans to get to the title game. Are we pumped up for the stretch run yet? Four down, nine to go. But we all know that you can only play one game at a time, so now it’s off to the desert to play the Cardinals and keep this winning streak alive.

The Cowboys pulled out another nail-biter on turkey day this year, beating the fish 20-19 on a last second field goal by rookie kicker Dan Bailey. I told you the game would be close, but who knew it would be a one-point game? I’ll tell you this, though… the kid is money! The Cowboys haven’t had a reliable kicker in a very long time, and I think they have found one in Bailey. God I love all-star undrafted free agent signings. (see Romo, Austin, Bailey) Tony Romo had two early interceptions that, thankfully, the defense limited to giving up only three points off of in the first half. He underthrew both of them. In the second half, Romo took care of the ball and escaped heavy pressure on multiple occasions and led his team to the game-winning field goal with three seconds left on the clock.
With two minutes left in the third quarter, Romo was almost sacked twice on consecutive plays, each time getting rid of the ball just in time and making the completions that extended the drive for the go ahead touchdown early in the fourth quarter. It was vintage Romo, using his feet, eyes, and arm to make a crucial play in a tight ballgame to help his team. The Romoboner was fully tumescent. On the day, Tony went 22 of 34 for 226 yards, 2 TD’s, and 2 picks. DeMarco Murray rushed for 87 hard fought yards on 22 carries, and Laurent Robinson added 79 yards on 7 receptions with 2 TD’s. The Cowboys are now 7-4 heading into December, with three of their last five games against divisional opponents. Stay focused, and kill Joe!

News around the NFL: Ndamukong Suh got pissed off against the Packers and stomped some big white guy Offensive Lineman, getting himself ejected, fined, and suspended. You’d think there was an award in his future. But no. Buffalo Bills Wide Receiver Stevie “Why So Serious” Johnson caught a touchdown pass against the Jets, and then proceeded to do his little touchdown dance that this time included shooting himself in the leg with his finger-gun, mocking Jets WR Plaxico (which is Nigerian for “daddy don’t wear no condom”) Burress, and then flying with outstretched wingspan into the ground like a crashing jet, garnering a 15 yard penalty for going to the ground in celebration without praying to Jesus. Let’s just say that making fun of crashing jets in New York City is not a popular stance to take. Then later in the game, on the potential game-winning drive, Johnson dropped a would-be touchdown pass that hit him right between the numbers, and the Bills lost. Stevie Johnson is our DFN of the Week Award recipient. Let’s all give him a round of applause. I believe he is actually a two-time winner of the award.
E-girls QB Michael “Bulldog” Vick has now missed two games in a row with broken ribs WITHOUT a punctured lung. Pussy!

Eli Update: She-li Womanning and his Gay-ants got their asses handed to them in New Orleans by the Saints, and are now in the midst of a three game losing streak. The Saints were gaining yards and scoring points at will against the Vagiants. Poor Eli. He looks so sad moping on the field as his ass is getting kicked. He needs a little cheese to go with his whine. Eli gets to play the Packers next, and then their losing streak will be extended. Remember: you can’t spell disemboweling without Eli. By the time Eli plays the Cowboys, his team will be beaten to shit and on a four game losing streak; completely demoralized by starting 6-2 and limping into Dallas at 6-6.

Next up for the Best Team In Football is a trip to Arizona to play the Cardinals. They will probably get Kevin “Corn on the” Kolb back at QB this week, but it won’t really matter. The Cowboys are going to win another one and extend their lead in the division. Lots of Cowboys fans there in Arizona. Just as long as Mat McBriar doesn’t punt the ball to Patrick Peterson, all those fans of the ‘Boys should be happy at the end of the day.

Prediction: Cowboys 28 – Cardinals 17
A good double digit road win is just what the doctor ordered for the Cowboys this week. Limit the mistakes and it’s a win. Dallas had far too many penalties on Thanksgiving, on both sides of the ball. Drive killing offensive penalties, and drive extending defensive penalties are tough to overcome. Garrett needs his team to play disciplined football this week to get ready for the stretch run to the playoffs.

Go Cowboys!

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